A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

Captain Metaphysics and the Postmodern Peril


Strawman Derrida defeated again!
Strawman Derrida defeated again!

Kant Goes to Poker Night


"Wait, but isn't stealing also wrong, according the the Categorical Imperative?"

"Ah, common mistake, you are applying the maxim too broadly. The maxim of what we are doing isn't 'stealing', it is 'getting one over on Nietzsche', which as you know is not only morally permissible, but in fact a moral imperative."
"Wait, but isn't stealing also wrong, according the the Categorical Imperative?" "Ah, common mistake, you are applying the maxim too broadly. The maxim of what we are doing isn't 'stealing', it is 'getting one over on Nietzsche', which as you know is not only morally permissible, but in fact a moral imperative."

Immanuel Kant: the 40 Year Old Virgin



Earlier that night:
"Is that really what you are wearing?"
"Yes, men love huge feather hats. They find them very attractive."
"Alright...whatever, let's just go."
Earlier that night: "Is that really what you are wearing?" "Yes, men love huge feather hats. They find them very attractive." "Alright...whatever, let's just go."

Captain Metaphysics and the Extreme Skeptic


Philosophical ideas that can be refuted by punching:
1. Moral Nihilism
2. Moral Relativism
3. Scepticism about the outside world
4. Scepticism about causation
5. Denial of qualia
6. That violence never accomplishes anything
Philosophical ideas that can be refuted by punching: 1. Moral Nihilism 2. Moral Relativism 3. Scepticism about the outside world 4. Scepticism about causation 5. Denial of qualia 6. That violence never accomplishes anything

Rebel Without a Constant Conjunction



"Hey Dad, I need some advice on dealing with some trouble I'm in with the Transcendental Idealists."
"Son, how many times have I told you not to hang around Transcendental Idealists? Why don't you hang out with that nice Empiricist boy from the church?"
"Berkeley? He is such a loser!"
"Hey Dad, I need some advice on dealing with some trouble I'm in with the Transcendental Idealists." "Son, how many times have I told you not to hang around Transcendental Idealists? Why don't you hang out with that nice Empiricist boy from the church?" "Berkeley? He is such a loser!"

Captain Metaphysics and the Ship of Theseus


You face is suddenly looking a lot like a problem of Metaphysics, Kant.
You face is suddenly looking a lot like a problem of Metaphysics, Kant.

Star Wars: but instead of normal, it's with philosophers



They made some prequels, but it had this one really annoying character, Jar Jar Nietzsche, and they weren't very well regarded.
They made some prequels, but it had this one really annoying character, Jar Jar Nietzsche, and they weren't very well regarded.

Star Trek: but instead of normal, it's with philosophers


You'd think I would have called it "The Wrath of Kant", but no. I decided to use a way better title instead.
You'd think I would have called it "The Wrath of Kant", but no. I decided to use a way better title instead.

Captain Metaphysics and the Wizard of Elea


Plus, everyone knows it's a stupid thought experiment anyway.
Plus, everyone knows it's a stupid thought experiment anyway.

Twelve Angry Philosophers



What? You didn't expect twelve philosophers to agree on something did you?
What? You didn't expect twelve philosophers to agree on something did you?

The Philosophy Superbowl



In many ways Wittgenstein is similar to Tom Brady, whose first Superbowl was also based on a mistake: the Tuck Rule. Also, they are both devastatingly handsome.
In many ways Wittgenstein is similar to Tom Brady, whose first Superbowl was also based on a mistake: the Tuck Rule. Also, they are both devastatingly handsome.

Ambiguity Woman


The only thing more unrealistic than absolute moral systems is her proportions
The only thing more unrealistic than absolute moral systems is her proportions

Captain Metaphysics and the Mereological Monster


Although when you think about it, it's probably still a monad
Although when you think about it, it's probably still a monad

Captain Metaphysics and the Ghost in the Machine


It's one of the best kept secrets in philosophy departments that most, if not all, metaphysical problems can be solved by punching stuff really hard.
It's one of the best kept secrets in philosophy departments that most, if not all, metaphysical problems can be solved by punching stuff really hard.

Immanuel Kant: Fresh Prince of Philosophy



It's a well known historical fact that David Hume laughed maniacally the entire time he was writing An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding.
It's a well known historical fact that David Hume laughed maniacally the entire time he was writing An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding.

World Cup Philosophy: Germany vs France




For best results, the commentator should be read in the voice of Michael Palin
For best results, the commentator should be read in the voice of Michael Palin

Language Games: Philosophers Play Pictionary



Growing up in a wealthy home, Wittgenstein never actually saw a beetle as a child. When he asked his parents and relatives what a beetle looked like, they gave descriptions, but he could tell they didn't know either. As he grew older, he theorized that no one had ever actually seen a beetle. He told all his philosopher friends, who just got really excited and assumed that he was making a profound point regarding the nature of language. He was too embarrassed to correct them and simply pretended like that was what he meant all along. He still isn't sure what a beetle is to this day, or if they even exist at all.
Growing up in a wealthy home, Wittgenstein never actually saw a beetle as a child. When he asked his parents and relatives what a beetle looked like, they gave descriptions, but he could tell they didn't know either. As he grew older, he theorized that no one had ever actually seen a beetle. He told all his philosopher friends, who just got really excited and assumed that he was making a profound point regarding the nature of language. He was too embarrassed to correct them and simply pretended like that was what he meant all along. He still isn't sure what a beetle is to this day, or if they even exist at all.

Dungeons & Dragons & Philosophers


About half the time spent on this comic was spent on figuring out how exactly Simone de Beauvoir's hair works, and it still ended up looking terrible. I make no apologies for Derrida's hair, however, for no artist alive can capture that glorious mane.
About half the time spent on this comic was spent on figuring out how exactly Simone de Beauvoir's hair works, and it still ended up looking terrible. I make no apologies for Derrida's hair, however, for no artist alive can capture that glorious mane.

The Problems of Philosophers


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