Friedrich Engels - Existential Comics

A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

Seize the Means of Production

Once the revolution is over the real work begins (infighting).

Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/514

Communist Brainstorming

Marx: "Alright, first item on the agenda: Does anyone have any ideas on how to overthrow capitalism?"

Goldman: "What if we painted a large pile of money on the side of a wall, and the capitalists will run for it trying to get the money, the smack into the wall, injuring themselves? "

Marx: "Uh...okay Goldman... moving on. Any other ideas?"
Engels: "Yeah, what if we expel the anarchists? "

Kropotkin: "How will that end capitalism?"
Engels: "Maybe we'll be stronger with...less people?"

Kropotkin: "What we really need to do is form another committee..."
Marx: "No, damnit, Kropotkin, no more committees. This is the committee."

Kropotkin: "Who made you the king of communism anyway, Marx?"
Marx: "Alright, that's it, anarchists get out!"
Kropotkin: "Gladly!"

Engels: "Now what are we going to do?"
Marx: "Well.."

Description: they have painted a large bag of money on the wall and rich people are crashing into it.
Marx: "Wow, she was right. This does work."

Also has anyone tried running really fast away from capitalists and getting them to chase you over a cliff? Could work.

Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/389

Marxist Brainstorming

Marx: "Alright guys, what is the one thing that the communist movement is really missing, that is preventing it from taking off? "

Engels: "Class consciousness among the proletariat? "
James Guillaume: "A large scale organized political party?"
Bakunin: "A trained militia capable of revolution?"
Engels: "Unity between different leftist groups? "

Marx: "What? No, I'm talking about a snappy slogan, obviously."

Marx: "So let's have a brainstorming session and think up a slogan good enough to bring about communism."
Bakunin: "Okay, what about..."

Bakunin: "Workers of the worlds...just say NO to capitalism."

Marx: "Alright Bakunin, well, it's a brainstorming session, so there are no bad ideas...i guess. Anyone else have a slogan?"

Guillaume: "What about this: workers of the world...stop having your surplus labor value taken away from you on account of the fact that it only takes some hours to produce..."

Marx: "Good, Engels, just not quite...zippy enough."

Guillaume: "What about: workers of the world, if you see a capitalist, punch him in the throat!"

Bakunin: "Why is it always throat punches with you, Guillaume?"

Guillaume: "The throat is the capitalist's weak point. It both swallows the bread created from the toil of the workers, and commands the labor of the proletariat! One good punch to the throat could bring down the whole rotten system!"

Marx: "Alright, well obviously the throat punching one is the best so far, but i feel like we still aren't there."

Marx: "Wait a minute, I've got it!"

Marx: "Workers of the world...UNITE!"

Bakunin: "Oh I see how it is, so we all have to unite. No room for individuals under Marx's communism."
Marx: "No, i just mean-"

Bakunin: "I know what you mean, well i have my own slogan: no Gods, no masters! And that includes the communist party!"

Bakunin: "Come on Guillaume, let's form our own party, with our own slogan."
Guillaume: "Yeah! No Gods, no masters, lots of throat punching!"

Marx: "God damnit. Why does this always happen?"

In the end the anarchists decided that any one overriding slogan was an unjustified hierarchical form of domination and it was up to each individual to freely pick their own slogan.

Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/366

The 100% True Story of the Writing of the Communist Manifesto

"A communist society will be organzied by the principle: from each according to his ability, to each according to his need" "Marx, chain smoking is NOT an ability" "Oh yeah? Then I'd like to see you try it"

Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/203

The Young Hegelians

There will be some who may remark that Marx, at the time that he was associated with the Young Hegelians, had not yet grown his trademark beard. This is nothing but lies and deceptions by the bourgeoisie, in an attempt to slander the socialist movement. The truth is that Marx was born with his glorious mane, and went to his grave with every hair on his perfect beard.

Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/148

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Seize the Means of Production

Communist Brainstorming

Marxist Brainstorming

The 100% True Story of the Writing of the Communist Manifesto

The Young Hegelians

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