Zera Yacob - Existential Comics

A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

Zera Yacob

"Zera Yacob was born in 1599, in Ethiopia. When he was 30 years old, King Susenyos converted to Catholicism, and ordered all his subjects to convert. "

"Zera Yacob refused, so he was exiled. Fearing persecution for his beliefs under the new King, he left the city and went alone to live in a cave."

"There he reflected on life and philosophy. He realized that every religion was fallible, since it's doctrines were written by men, not God."

"He knew then that the only way the find the real truth was the use our reason, observe the world, and find out things for ourselves. Reason was common to all, no matter the customs of each culture."

"For two years he studied, and thought, alone in his cave. Then he heard the King had died, and he could go among the people again, and teach them his philosophy."

Description: Zera Yacob comes back out of the cave and preaches to the people.

Yacob: "Hear my words people: I have returned, and i have been enlightened by my time solitude, and i tell you that all dogmas and religions are the works of men, not of God."

Yacob: "Some religions say we must not eat meat on Friday, but fish is allowed. Others say we cannot eat pork. Others say any meat is allowed. "

Yacob: "Are we to believe God created these rules? If so, how do we know? The only way to discover the truth is through our own faculty of reason, which God gave us."

Yacob: " Instead of us fighting over dogmas passed down from generation to generation, we should promote harmony in the world among all of humanity equally."

Person in crowd: "Wow."

Yacob: "Yes, I'm sure you can see the wisdom in this, which i realized aft-"

Person in crowd: "No, I mean wow, like...wow, we really hate that idea."

Yacob: "Wait, what?"

Person in crowd: "Yes we want to follow dogmas, and kill the people following the wrong one, just like men everywhere have always done."
Second person: "In fact, we are killing the Catholics right now."

Yacob: "God damnit you guys."

One problem with going back into Plato's cave to enlighten the people is that people fundamentally like being stupid idiots.

Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/377

The Philosophy of a Good Party

Francis Bacon: "This party is lame."
Zera Yacob: "But how do we make a better party?"

Francis Bacon: "Can't we just observe what other parties are like, collect data, and analyze what is or isn't good? I saw a party last week with a keg, maybe we should try that."

Zera Yacob: "We can't just blindly follow the creed of others, Francis Bacon, we have to use our reason to find the universal truth of what a good party is."

Francis Bacon: "So what do we do, Zera Yacob?"
Zera Yacob: "We have to create a party which harmonizes with the universal and absolute reason of God, and the world."
Francis Bacon: "But how do we do that?"

Zera Yacob: "We have to figure out a way to make our party comfortable for everyone, so everyone can relax and have a good time."
Hegel: "Are you serious?! Comfortable? Relaxing? You've misunderstood not only parties, but reason itself."
Zera Yacob: "What do you mean, Hegel?"

Hegel: "Reason is not a pure abstraction that can come immediately to the truth, it is a process of refining our concepts towards an ever building idea."

Hegel: "That's why a good party pushes forward the dialectic, it challenges us on the very concept of a party, makes us examine what a party even is."

Zera Yacob: "What are you saying?"
Hegel: "I'm saying we need to get real freaky with it."
Zera Yacob: "Uh..."

Hegel: "What if we all put on blindfolds, and descended into the basement. At random, half of us would be the 'masters' and half of us would be the 'slaves.' "

Hegel: "Then, through the power struggle of obedience and rebellion, we would come to an even greater understanding of our own self-consciousness."

Hegel, holding up a ball gag and straps: "Here, put these on, and take some coke."

Zera Yacob: "Okay, first of all...no."

Zera Yacob: "And second of all, I've realized that you are disrupting the harmony of our party, lame though it may be, so you are going to have to leave."

Hegel: "You see, this is great, it is all part of the dialectical process, you've given the antithesis to my thesis."

Hegel: "Now we just have to come to a synthesis of our competing ideas, like...what if you didn't have to wear the ball gag?"
Francis Bacon and Zera Yacob together: "NO!"

Francis Bacon: "Carry on with the lame party?"
Zera Yacob: "Yes please."

It turns out that a good party is mostly just a party without Hegel.

Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/319

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