Dungeons and Dragons and Philosophers VI: The Angsty Dragon of Angst
It's better to not even begin playing D&D than it is to play as a Bard.
"But you made Care Bears creepy and weird" No. Wrong. The Care Bears were always creepy and weird
Eventually they figured out that Kafka was actually fired years ago, but due to a glitch in the payroll system he kept getting paid. So they fixed the glitch.
Sartre stopped inviting Kierkegaard, because Kierkegaard kept giving him crosses and trying to get him to talk about the stages of despair.
Fastest Gun in the Continent
I'm pretty sure if my computer had free will, it would use it 99% of the time to be a judgemental dick to me.
Philosophy Tech Support
Hello, customer complaints, this is Leibniz. Oh yeah? Well, this is the best of all possible customer support centers, so that can't be true
Language Games: Philosophers Play Pictionary
Growing up in a wealthy home, Wittgenstein never actually saw a beetle as a child. When he asked his parents and relatives what a beetle looked like, they gave descriptions, but he could tell they didn't know either. As he grew older, he theorized that no one had ever actually seen a beetle. He told all his philosopher friends, who just got really excited and assumed that he was making a profound point regarding the nature of language. He was too embarrassed to correct them and simply pretended like that was what he meant all along. He still isn't sure what a beetle is to this day, or if they even exist at all.