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Philosophy Emergency
![Emergency Responder: "Philosophy Emergency Hotline, what is your emergency?"
Caller: "I'm at a dinner party and my friend is carrying on about how postmodern neo-marxists are corrupting our youth by teaching them that everything is as true as everything else."
Emergency Responder: "Okay, i need you to stay calm. Did you try explaining to him that Marxism is a modernist philosophy and is fundamentally at odds with postmodernism?"
Caller: "Yes, but he just said that both philosophies were against “Enlightenment Valuesâ€, so they are basically the same."
Emergency Responder: "Good god, we'll send a squadron right away."
[description]: Aristotle bursts down the door.
Aristotle: "We don't debate with people who haven't read a single book on the topic they want to debate!"
Aristotle, through the door: "Philosophy Swat Team, open up!"
PERSON: "Never! I just want a rational debate."
Aristotle: "You are under arrest for philosophical slander, strawmanning, bad faith arguments, and just generally being a dumbass."
PERSON: "Help! Censorship! I'm being censored because they are afraid of the truth."
Aristotle: "That's enough out of you, we are taking you downtown."
PERSON: "Wait, this isn't jail... it is just the library."
Aristotle: "Exactly. Now read a god damn book."](http://static.existentialcomics.com/comics/PhilosophyEmergency.png "So actually...making people understand what they are talking about is censorship of their ignorant views. Making me read a book is censorship.")
So actually...making people understand what they are talking about is censorship of their ignorant views. Making me read a book is censorship.
There are a large number of people who spend a good majority of their time and energy worrying about something called "postmodern neo-marxists", while rather amazingly, not being able to name a single one, or describe what they believe. Apparently though, these mysterious postmodernists think that "everything is as true as everything else" (a position that no one has ever held), and are engaged in some kind of systematic plot to destroy Western Civilization, by using...linguistic relativism, or something? It's kind of hard to say.
Permanent Link to this Comic: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/289
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